The Woods

I've been wandering in the woods for almost 12 years now...utterly lost for the past 7. Time increasingly seems to have little meaning, as each moment blurs into the next.

My machete is long gone. Along with most of my will and discipline. Whatever path led me here, it doesn't exist anymore to retrace my steps. These woods are treacherous, perilous, and unforgiving. There has been no light, only perpetual darkness. And hope wanes. I am finally almost altogether broken.

Is that galloping I hear approaching from the distance?

Rip Van Winkle

It's been a while.  Four years exactly.  I've been somewhere...resting...sleeping?  The long hiatus has altered my purpose somehow.  Everything is different.
 
The path?  Finding the path again will be difficult, maybe even impossible.  I'm fairly certain these aren't even the same woods!  Significantly different terrain awaits me.  The quiet is eerie and makes me uneasy.  I'm blessed to still have my machete, at least.  Rusted, but certainly still capable of cutting the necessary swath. 

Into the woods! 

Sanctuary

Seeking refuge from the chaos, I recently found an oasis in the form of my daughter’s wedding. It was a welcome and joyous relief! Most importantly, the day was filled with incredible happiness and fun.

The campaign trail had long ago taken its toll on my stamina and I crossed the finish line on pure fumes. I was fortunate to make it a competitive race but ultimately, came up short in my quest. Surprisingly, there was as much relief as disappointment in the loss.

The oasis has slowly dissipated over the last week, but the calm has remained. I am committed to regaining my life focus…which means getting my priorities back in alignment. My aim is to simplify. Life, by choice, has been much too complex lately. I’ve been juggling far too many balls, and while I’ve been largely successful at doing so, my arms are tired. I’ve already begun the process of unwinding my elective responsibilities and expect to enter the New Year completely free of obligations. It’s necessary.

I’ll continue to rest until the forest swallows me up again. When it does, I’ll be ready to resume my search for the right path.

Patience

Surprisingly, many people think of me as a patient man. I’m always amazed at that assessment because I know the truth – I’m not as patient as I appear or would ultimately like to be. Patience is probably one of life’s hardest and most important lessons. To learn patience…well, you have to be patient.

True patience is hard to attain because it competes against so many of your other emotions. Emotions that can unleash themselves in a hurry and without restraint if you’re not paying close attention. I’m a long ways from really being patient but I appreciate that some people think I am – that hopefully means I’m making progress.

The Clearing

I’ve arrived at the edge of the clearing. I’ll be free to move in whatever direction I choose…at least for a while. I’ll be back in the woods eventually, but for now, I’m relieved and invigorated by the latitude afforded in the open space, despite the vulnerability.

Back to Basics

Priorities are being re-prioritized whether I like it or not. I suppose I half-expected it to happen sooner or later…and now it’s later. It’s an adjustment I’m willing to make anyway so the transition will be easy enough. I lost the path long ago – destined for the circuitous route through the underbrush. I’m blessed to now possess a machete and am determinedly cutting a swath to travel. It isn’t so much where it leads in the moment, just that I keep moving forward with purpose. I’ve begun to wonder if the path is actually beneath me after all, and the hardship and uncertainty of the undefined trek is intended. Either way, I’m up for the task.

Quicksand

I haven’t seen the path now in quite a while. For most of the past week, I’ve been mired in quicksand, but I luckily was able to grab a branch and seemingly will survive. My priorities have become crystal clear (funny how adversity does that) but the challenge to consistently keep them in proper perspective remains. It’s inevitable something will have to give. Like the Old Man, I have to recognize my limitations. For the moment anyway, I’m content to catch my breath. I know I’ll figure out the right balance but first I have to listen better. I’m reminded that the journey is not based on how much I think I know, but rather on my application of God’s truth on the course of daily living.